5.3.14

The thing about chemo is the 'chemo brain'!
Im sure somewhere on my blog i have mentioned rats? I had them when i moved in to my house last year and 'Marisa the rat' put poison down. Now they're back so I've had Russell Rat round.
Logically i thought it out!! Theres no point putting poison down to kill the rat under my floor boards (after moving a large pine dresser and all thats on it, and in it! Carpets, floor boards, etc), just to find, as Marisa has suggested, my sewer pipe is broken and the little 'sh*t' is getting in that way! Cos then his brother and sister, mother and father will also call in, maybe even a little rat funeral, who knows what their culture is?
It would be far better to shove a camera down my pipes, nothing anatomical or physiological meant here, no euphemism! Check out any damage, correct it, and voila, no more rats. Thats the idea.
I ring dynarod and they're semi helpful. Yes they will do the cctv, i have to find the manhole cover and see if my insurance covers the said 'pipeoscopy'.
Man hole cover found. Useful.
Insurance company contacted. Not so useful!
'Just enquiring if my insurance policy covers the fact that i have rats and they may be coming in through a broken sewerage pipe?'
'If its rats, probably not!'
'Why? Its not the rats that broke the pipe???'
'Oh, we might do then!'
Spoke to human with a brain and some sense and it was suggested i ring the water board.
Water board contacted. Useful.
Yes we will come and see if you share a pipe (urgh, why does that make me queasy?). If so, we are responsible, if not, we still may be responsible depending on where it is. We will be round in 1 - 5 days. Success.
I decide to call on my neighbour, the local drug dealer! He's been shopped to the police by all the neighbours - not myself i might add.
'Hi, I'm from next door. Someone may come round to remove the ivy creeping up my wall and window. Don't know who and don't know when, but is that ok? Oh and do you have rats? Do we share a sewer pipe?'
All this is blurted out, with a bit of hesitation and a bit of stuttering. A drug dealer. Obviously has connections with the mafia. I better be careful!!! He may have a gun!!!
The way a woman's brain works!!!
The way a menopausal woman's brain works!!!
The way a menopausal woman with chemo brain's brain works!!!
Anyway, i carry on with my simple but painful exchange of questions and information!
'I have rats and they may be coming in through the sewers and Wessex Water will be visiting in the next few days so if you see a man snooping around, thats who it is.'
In my head, I'm thinking he's hearing, 'There will be armed police swarming the place checking you out for drugs and I'm the one who's grassed!'
He stands there, with a deadpan face, and very few words in answer to my many stuttering, spluttering, uncomfortable questions.
Yes thats fine (the ivy), no to rats, no to sharing a pipe (a sewer pipe, not a drug smoking pipe), and can you get your husband to trim this bush?
I don't have a husband, but if i did, i would!! What a stupid answer.
Im gonna have to watch my back!