12.2.14

Oh woe is me!
I had chemo number 2 yesterday. It went so well. Had roast chicken for lunch, lots of giggles with me Linda. A different nurse, Liz and she was equally as good as the last one. They're so helpful and make you feel so positive about it all. Wonderful people.

I finished the chemo at 1.30 and had to wait till 3 for my injection to stimulate my bone marrow to make more white cells as my count was low. So, we decided to walk into Poole to the health shop to get some special shampoo and conditioner. Apparently its best to have Ph balanced shampoo without harsh chemicals, and don't wash your hair so much, don't rub your hair or do anything stressful to it. I also bought some clothes etc and had a cup of tea and cakey in Marks and Spencers.

On the way back to the hospital i started to feel tired and realised i had maybe over done it a little. By the time i got back to the ward, i felt washed out. 

Had my jab and was ready for home. I did feel remarkably exhausted and was keen to get home and relax.

At home I refilled my hot water bottle, and sat on my chair with my blanky (how old am i?). Tv on the bakery programme. But i couldn't settle. I was shivering and shaking. I remember Liz telling me i was having hydrocortisone which stops the fluey feeling that one of the chemo drugs can give. It obviously wasn't working. 

I then realised i was feeling nauseous. More than anything, i don't like that feeling. I dashed to the loo and was really sick. Looks like the anti-emetic hadn't worked either. 

I thought id better ring the cancer hotline. This is specially for chemo patients if they have any worries at all. The nurses tell you this over and over so you know you always have some support.       I spoke to a nice male nurse, and gave him the whole story. Anyone who knows me, knows i can't just give a brief outline. I have to tell the whole story including the pattern on the curtains!!! He advised me to take 2 of the anti-emetic tablets and if i continued to vomit i could expect a visit from a district nurse who would give me a jab. 

After half an hour i started to feel better. I was even joking with my friend Mary (also a district nurse) when she phoned to ask how i was feeling.

Onwards and upwards. I started to feel a lot better, although still exhausted. The shivering had stopped. 

I decided i ought to take my temperature. If i have a temp, i have to phone the hotline and theres a possibility i would have to stay in hospital and have antibiotics. It was 37.5. I was advised to ring the hotline. Spoke to a nice nurse who said if it spiked to 38 to ring again and i would have to go in to the hospital to be treated.

Took it 15 mins later and it was 36.7. 10 mins later 37.5. The thermometer was bleeping and going, and i was feeling there was a problem with it. I noticed last time i used it it seemed to be inaccurate.  What should i do now? My thermometer seems to be broken. I need to get treatment if temp goes up. It seemed to me the logical thing was to call in to the hospital and get my temp taken so i could either be treated or go home to bed and buy a new thermometer the next day.

I rang the hotline and left a message telling her the 'whole' story, and waited for a reply. Nothing. Now i know they're busy, so i waited a while. The message on the hotline says if we don't get back to you, try again, and if we still don't get back to you, ring the ward. So i rang the hotline again and apologised for ringing again but wondered if i could come in and have my temperature taken. No reply. So i rang the ward and spoke to a lady who didn't seem to know what to suggest other than take your temp in half an hour. I pointed out, again, my thermometer is broken. She went off to speak to somebody else and came back to me. I can't remember exactly what she advised but i had an answer for it and she went off to ask advice again. Then the 'somebody' she was getting her advice from came on the line and said abruptly, 'Can i help you?' I told her my story and realised it was the nurse who advised me to ring when my temp reached 38. 

'I told you to ring when your temp was 38, 37.5 is fine.' 

I explained the broken thermometer. 

'Well buy a new one then!'

It was 10.30pm, where would i get one?

'They sell them everywhere. Even Tescos. We can't come to your house to take you temperature!'

I replied that i hadn't asked for that.

'We are a ward here and if i have to keep talking to you i can't be looking after my patients!' or words to that effect.

I replied, 'I'm aware of that, i used to be a nurse myself. I was just asking if maybe i should come in and have my temperature taken so i can either go to bed or be treated.'

'You don't want to come here unless absolutely necessary because we have bugs here!'

'So if my temp was 38, what would happen?'

'You'd have to come in to be treated. You're obviously panicking about this and getting yourself in a state!'

'No, I'm not panicking, or even upset, i just wondered whether i should have my temperature taken as I've been advised its dangerous to get an infection and not treat it! But don't worry, i will send my son out to buy a new thermometer and i will wait until it is 38. Im sorry you feel I'm wasting your time, but i was told i should ring this number if i had any queries.'

'Yes you should, but I've already given you advice and told you to wait till your temperature is 38.

Do you feel unwell?'

'Not so much now, although i do feel hot and flushed. Ive been sick and I've been very shivery, so much so that i was unable to dial the number on the phone when i rang in earlier.'

'Oh you've had a rigor? And you vomited? You never told me you had a rigor!'

To be fair, I've forgotten what I've told whom at that stage. But i know i told the male nurse when i first rang in. So it should be on my notes.

'Don't worry, I will go and buy a new thermometer, don't worry about it.' At this time i was frustrated, amazed at her treatment of me, surprised that she was thinking i wanted her to come to my house to take my temperature, and a whole load of other stuff going round my head. I was gobsmacked.

'No, no, no. I think you need to speak to a doctor!!!'

She then softened and became very pleasant and warm. She commented on my thermometer, 'Oh so you bought a posh digital one and it still doesn't work?' She was my buddy all of a sudden.

The doctor rang me at 12.15am.  He asked me what had been going on. My temp was stable at 37.5 so he said i should be ok and not to worry, but if i had any worries - yes you got it - RING THE HOTLINE! I told him i felt unable to do this and explained what had happened this evening. He said he was very upset to hear this and i am not a paranoid nuisance and i can ring the number whenever i like and not to let anyone make me feel like I'm wasting their time.

Since then i slept really well and feel a lot better this morning. My temp is 36.7. And all is well with the world.

Im shocked by it all. I feel I've been let down by the hotline. I could have done without all of that rubbish.

All i wanted was my temperature taken!