Sunday 11 January 2015

11.1. 15


Just a quickie!
Normality. its a word thrown about in the circles i move in!
It used to be 'Positivity', but since the decease of my cancer, its now 'normality'.
The goal posts have moved now. My normal was me about 18 months ago. I was 3 stone lighter. I had longish hair. I didn't have a cough or painful joints. No heart wall defect and although cancer is a word that can effect everyone and anyone, it wasn't in MY vocabulary!
My normal now is the opposite of the above paragraph.
I am tempted to buy a few chickens and use the wishbones to try and correct some of the correctable damage.
Or to camp out at night looking for shooting stars so i can make a wish on them.
Alternately, i could try a bit harder to lose some weight. The hair will come in time, and is well on the way. The cough has diminished greatly at the mo. The joints, not so bad really!
The broken heart unfortunately won't mend, but is a minor issue due to its size.
The cancer and its return or the event of a secondary cancer is real, but in the lap of the gods.
So why am i not normal enough?
Its all in my head! Its psychological, mainly.
Obviously the diet is a real thing, and must be done, and urgently. It will change a lot of other things, I'm hoping.
Gosh, in a couple of paragraphs, I've just solved all my problems, on paper anyway.  Forget the chickens and their wishbones, and all the stars in the sky. Its all down to me!
YAY positivity is back!
And YAY normality (albeit a new normal) is back too.


2 comments:

  1. Love this post. Totally understand. Embrace your 'new normal', the new you. Things won't be the same again, and it will seem like a grieving process, but perhaps the new normal can be better? I hope so anyway. I'm still figuring out who this new person, who this new me is; but I'm excited to find out, and I hope you feel the same about yourself... Let go and enjoy the journey :) xxx

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  2. Thanks Catherine. I knew you would understand. Good luck with finding the new you. xx

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